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Ohio River Life

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Stop resisting the reality of the U.S. empire



by M. Stewart
Ah, Memorial Day in the nation's capital . . . the dream of every American, unless you want to dance. It turns out that several American citizens were roughed up and arrested by park police for doing just that at the Jefferson Memorial. I'm sure there is more to this story, but the video doesn't look good. I hope someone follows up with more information about the incident. If this is an accurate depiction of what went on, we have problems. And all of this in full view of TJ's idol!

In another news item characterized as a free-speech issue, New York resident Younus Mohamman has been arrested in Morocco and is awaiting extradition for allegedly issuing threats over a year-old South Park cartoon in which the prophet Mohammed is depicted inside a bear suit. According to Mohamman, "The case is a perfect example of the reality that touted principles like 'freedom of speech and freedom of expression' do not apply to people that seek to expose the reality of the U.S. Empire."

I think the biggest problem with Islamic culture is that it never developed a comedic tradition. Way too many Muslims take themselves way too seriously. As some of you may recall, I tried to pull the Muslim chain with my own drawing of Mohammed last year, but nobody responded with death threats. Well, here it is again, and he is dancing!

Speaking of comedy, America's favorite media whore Sarah Palin was at it again over the holiday weekend. This time she showed up in Washington D.C. at a Memorial Day motorcycle fashion show. Muslims need to take a tip from American Christians. These people know how to laugh at themselves!

About the only thing funnier than Palin running for president is . . . well . . . uh . . . I'm sorry . . . there is nothing funnier than Sarah Palin running for president!  Go Sarah, go! You are a shining beacon of American culture. Damn it, Jim, this really is a great country!

Click on Sarah to enlarge. Flick that tongue, baby!

Friday, May 27, 2011

R.I.P. Orlando's Pizza/East Liverpool

Click to enlarge.

Straiton & Storm's

Ghost sign on the old Trotter's Store building, Dresden Avenue, East Liverpool. Click to enlarge.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

More of the old YMCA

1. Entrance from Fourth Street.
2. Stairway looking down from the fourth floor. 3. Gymnasium with large windows. 4. One of the residential rooms on the third floor. Click to enlarge. (M. Stewart)

Given area residents' love for cinder blocks and suburbs, it's a foregone conclusion that this solid, beautiful, historic building will be left to rot.


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Undefeated

by M. Stewart
I see where Republican media whore Sarah Palin will launch a two-hour movie “epic” next month designed to “tout her strengths” in preparation for a presidential run. The title of said movie is The Undefeated, and allegedly this “epic” will document her “years as governor and rise to nationwide attention.” (See Palin’s Secret Weapon, but only if you haven’t eaten for a while.)

If there is a legitimate Republican Party left in this country, it continues to struggle against John McCain’s desperate decision to embrace American moron culture in 2008 by selecting Palin as his running mate. What Palin brought to the table is a persistent belief that there are no intellectual qualifications for the presidency. Of course it’s all a joke (see below), but it is a joke that has gotten out of hand.

Always looking for ways to turn a buck, Fox News gave Palin a microphone, but she quickly became a laughing stock, prompting Fox News president Roger Ailes to refer to her as “stupid.” So with even the Fox crew laughing at her, what constituency does Palin hope to convince with her narcissistic epic?

Given the Republican Party’s descent into comedy over the past three years, I wouldn’t be surprised if Harold Camping, the Rapture king himself, were to run for president. No doubt Palin’s supporters are at work as we speak trying to dissuade Camping for fear that his candidacy would take too many votes away from Palin.

I remember back in the 1960s and ‘70s when a comedian from the Smothers Brothers show named Pat Paulsen would run for president every four years. Paulsen was a gifted deadpan comedian who would be right at home in today’s Republican Party. As much as America enjoyed Paulsen’s antics 40 years ago, he doesn’t hold a candle to Sarah Palin, who is the master of satire.

What most people don’t realize is that “Sarah Palin” is the stage name of Ruth Gaston, a Vancouver native who created the “Sarah Palin” character with husband James Ranier (Todd Palin) as a means of breaking into comedy.

Gaston and Ranier launched their “Sarah and Todd Palin” act in a Vancouver comedy club in 1996 and eventually took the act east to Toronto and Montreal before hitting the summer circuit in upstate New York. Realizing that people in the United States took them seriously, James hatched the idea of moving to a small town in Alaska and actually running for elected office. The original idea was to make a movie that the couple hoped would make them rich and famous.

As it turned out, the plan worked so well that Ruth (as Sarah) ended up becoming the governor of the Alaska and eventually the vice-presidential running mate of John McCain, who was looking for a pretty face that no one knew about.

The Undefeated is the film that Ruth and James had originally set out to make in Wasilla, Alaska. “It’s kinda gotten out of hand,” James said, “but we’re just rollin’ with it.”

James said that Ruth has been playing the “Sarah Palin” character so well for so long that she no longer remembers her real name and identity. In short, she has become Sarah Palin. “I don’t really say much about it,” James confided. “The money’s good, and I’ve grown to like ‘Sarah’ over the years. I just play it straight.”

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

In a Patti Smith kind of mood

Inside Mr. Newbold's YMCA

Click to enlarge.


Monday, May 23, 2011

Out the windows of the old YMCA

 Photos taken from inside the old YMCA building in East Liverpool on Saturday morning. On the top is the Kent State East Liverpool Mary Patterson Memorial. Below is the view to the west from the fourth floor. Although I tried to remove smudges and smears from the photos, the windows I shot through were pretty dirty and some irregularities remain. More photos from inside the YMCA are forthcoming. Click to enlarge. (M. Stewart)


Saturday, May 21, 2011

Flying Fortress B-17: The Liberty Belle

Former Morning Journal writer Jeff Martin sent these pics and of the Boeing Flying Fortress B-17 "Liberty Belle," a replica of the original that flew over a dozen missions during World War II. It was brought to Kansas City, where Jeff now lives, for a two day event sponsored by the Liberty Foundation. Individual rides were $430. 

The three "Rs"--and one of them isn't "Rapture"

by M. Stewart
Even though it’s still a bit early in the day, I’m going to go out on a limb and declare the Rapture a bust. Jesus has left the building. Or perhaps he was never there.

There are two separate questions to consider: 1) Why would Harold Camping risk the obvious humiliation of “guaranteeing” that May 21 would bring about the cartoon known as the Rapture? 2) Why would anybody living in the 21st century believe it?

The first question is easy. According to IRS data, Camping’s mass-media channel, Family Radio, brought in $18 million in contributions in 2009. The total worth of Family Radio is $72 million. People will continue to send him millions of dollars, even after his "guarantee" has been proven false. Let us never forget the quotation attributed to well-known circus huckster P.T. Barnum: “There is a sucker born every minute.”

The second question is more complex. Why do so many 21st-century people still buy into religious fantasies? There is no easy, single answer. What I do know is that there is a strong correlation between religious faith and a lack of education in the humanities and sciences.

When I say “education” I don’t mean four years of job training or the acquisition of university degrees. I mean the serious study of history, literature, psychology, art, philosophy, biology, physics, astronomy, and mass media. Although it helps, attending a university is by no means required to become educated in any of these vital fields. You just have to know how to read well, and that’s a skill most people don’t have.

Simply being able to read is like knowing how to count. Indeed, you must be able to count before you can do calculus, but counting is only the first step in understanding how the universe really works. Likewise, the critical thinking skills that come with advanced literacy are necessary to fend off the relentless agents of greed and delusion that assail us from cradle to grave. Reading, writing, and arithmetic really are the keys to the kingdom.

If you are a Christian, consider the following: According to Christian scriptures, Jesus asked no one for money. He was a homeless wandering teacher who spoke out against materialism, wealth, power, and religious authority. Like Socrates before him, he was executed for spreading subversive ideas. In the written accounts of his teaching, which were composed by men who had never met him or heard him speak, Jesus said nothing about a Rapture. 

I know this because I can and do read books--including the Bible.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Debbie Harry on the Rapture

Rexella Van Impe on the Rapture

Two days left to Rapture

by M. Stewart
We have just two days to manage our affairs before the Rapture comes at 6:30 p.m. Saturday. According to media reports, there will be a world-wide earthquake at that time. I haven't seen anything addressing the problem of the world's different time zones, so we'll all just go with the 6:30 thing until we receive further instructions.

Given the theology behind the Rapture, there is little doubt that I will be left behind; still, I'm a tad jumpy at the prospect of mistakes. What if an atheist happens to be standing beside a Raptured Christian when he or she is sucked up into the mother ship? Is it possible to get caught in the suction ray? We really can't know these things, so my plan is to avoid getting in that position.

The earthquake could be a problem for those of us who live close to nuclear power plants. I've been saving up my iodine pills for just this sort of thing. If you have any extras and you're not planning on being here for the trials and tribulations, please text me. I'll come over and pick them up on Friday.

If I find out anything more about the time-zone thing, I'll post it here. It's important to know the exact time in your area.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Power of 32

by M. Stewart
One of the biggest problems we face living at the center of a Tri-State Area is being choked by arbitrary political dividing lines. According to today's Post-Gazette, there is an organization called the "Power of 32" that wants to reduce the debilitating effects of those borders and foster regional economic development.

Unfortunately, "32 counties seek economic cooperation" seems only to be in the print edition of today's PG, so I can't offer a link. For us, the important part is that "Power of 32" includes Columbiana, Hancock, and Beaver counties--our little portion of the Tri-State Area. Perhaps there has been some local coverage of the group, but I haven't seen anything in our local papers.

On the hyper-local level, we have seen the negative effects of divisive competition here in Columbiana County. The lack of cooperation between East Liverpool and the surrounding townships is the easiest example. At the April 27 mayoral candidates debate, city Mayor Jim Swoger pointed to cooperation  with the townships as a priority of his administration. I must confess that I haven't seen much evidence of that. The city's problems with Liverpool Township are well known, but that animosity comes largely from the township. Clearly the city is not at war with St. Clair Township, but there is no effort afoot (that I am aware of) to solve common problems. And the Columbiana County Mason-Dixon Line is infamous.

In any case, the "Power of 32" group is not interested in micro issues; rather, it wants to attack the region's economic problems by easing the tribal differences that state lines bring. Despite those lines, we in Columbiana County, Ohio live in the Pittsburgh Metropolitan Area, and I'm glad that someone from Pittsburgh is finally willing to include us.

If they have not done so already, perhaps our local papers can contact the "Power of 32" and find out if we have any genuine local representation. Let's hope its not just another way for politicians to appear to be doing something constructive. Because this is the first I've heard of it, I cannot say.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Spazz out with Joe Cocker -- 1969

Monday, May 16, 2011

Rapture on Saturday

by M. Stewart
I'm really going to miss my family, all of whom are Christians. As many of you know, this coming Saturday, May 21, is the day most Christians have been anticipating for centuries. It is known as the Rapture, and as of this writing, we have five days to prepare.

As I understand it, both the dead and the living "in Christ" will leave their bodies behind and ascend into the heavens. The rest of us will be left to face several years of "trials and tribulations" prior to the second coming of Jesus, who will defeat the Antichrist and subsequently rule the Earth as a king for a millennium What happens after that is anyone's guess. Bible doesn't say.

All I can ask is that Christians do not drive on Saturday. The last thing we need is to have millions of cars and trucks careening down the highway with dead, limp corpses behind the wheel. Have a little consideration for your godless brothers and sisters.

With all the Christians gone, I suppose this means Islam will have a free hand here on Earth--at least during the trials and tribulations period. Well that's just great! Can anyone out there tell me whether the Muslims have a Rapture scheduled anytime soon? If not, maybe someone can schedule one. How about a world-wide Muslim Suicide Bomber Day? If not, I really don't look forward to the next seven years.

Back to the departing Christians . . .

Many of you I won't miss, so let me just say bon voyage. To those kind and gentle Christians who spend their days trying to make the world a better place, know that those you leave behind will miss you. I know you gotta do what you gotta do, but if it turns out that you have a choice, please consider sticking around. If you do, you'll get to see the Second Coming, which is bound to be pretty cool.


I can imagine that next Sunday will be a kind of free-for-all here on Earth. With all those empty homes and abandoned cars, there is bound to be some looting. Those of us who stay behind are going to have to stand watch on our own homes lest we are mistaken for the Raptured. Frankly, I anticipate some serious problems, so get out your guns and lock the doors. It's going to be a while before things settle down.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

First Friday cookout a big success

Dave Marshall, owner of the Mezzanine in downtown East Liverpool, had his first Friday lunchtime cookout yesterday. I had a fantastic Italian sausage sandwich, as did Kim Schneider (right). Dave and Shirley will be serving up sausage, hamburgers, and hot dogs every Friday throughout the summer in front of Coffee Fusion on Fifth Street. Click to enlarge.

Friday, May 13, 2011

This is real (I think)

Thursday, May 12, 2011

THEY can read your mind

by M. Stewart
Virtually every day I read something about the erosion of personal privacy. Most people know that if you use Facebook or any other social media site, you are a wide-open book. But if you use a computer at all, a cell phone, or a credit/debit card; fill out forms or surveys; shop; have a job; pay taxes; have an address; or in some places just walk down the street—THEY are watching every move you make.

Most likely THEY are computers that don't really care what you do—that is, until someone wants to know. Still, never before have the details of our lives been so knowable, so visible, so marketable, so well organized. Those of us who think about privacy issues have always felt some comfort in knowing that however much information THEY have about us, THEY cannot invade our brains. THEY cannot know what we’re actually thinking.

Well folks, now THEY can. And wouldn’t you know it, a computer is at the bottom of it. Check out this story from NPR titled Mind Reading: Technology Turns Thought into Action.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Age of Reason

by M. Stewart
The most significant lesson of what we call “postmodernism” is that there is no objective truth, only subjective perspectives. We see it operating every day in the fields of politics and religion, and there is no better example than world reaction to the killing of Osama bin Laden.

Look at the reaction of radical Muslims. Al Qaida is swearing “revenge” for the killing, which in itself was revenge for a hate-inspired terrorist attack on the United States. Somehow these people have decided that taking down a mass murderer is a crime worthy of retaliation. Pakistanis, upset because the U.S. conducted a surgical strike inside their border, are demonstrating on the streets. Pay no mind to the simple fact that the Pakistani government clearly was part of a conspiracy to hide bin Laden while accepting $billions in aid from the U.S.

To say that there are many “truths” in the world doesn’t mean that there is no right and wrong, and in this case, the U.S. is on the side of right.  

History clearly shows that mixing religion and politics is dangerous and often lethal, and one of the fundamental tenets of Islam is that there is no difference between religion and politics. As a result, it’s not rational to assume that there is such a thing as an apolitical Muslim.

That’s precisely why non-Muslim Americans don’t trust American Muslims. So if you’re going to walk around wearing your Islamic faith as a “uniform,” then you are going to have to suffer the consequences. Whether this is fair or unfair isn’t the issue; it’s about the human survival instinct. If suicide bombing is one of the ways Muslims demonstrate their faith—and it clearly is—don’t expect anyone to assume you are innocent until proven guilty. Thanks to Muslim terrorists, pluralism is no longer possible in free societies.  

But let’s not stop with Muslims; most evangelical Christians in the U.S. also make no distinction between religion and politics. They are constantly telling us that our government was “founded on Christian principles.” They make this claim contrary to rational evidence, but religious people are never rational. If they were, they wouldn’t be religious.

While it does exist, Christian terrorism is not so popular these days, and suicide bombing—that is, killing yourself so that you can kill other innocent people to impress an imaginary god—is not rampant in the Christian world. As such, Christians tend to pose little immediate threat in the crowded marketplace. Yes, there still are Timothy McVeighs running around in the world, and it’s always possible that an individual Christian or sect could start killing innocent people for their god, but the odds do not favor it.  

Because most religious people consider it a fundamental directive to spread their particular beliefs around the world, we must assume that different religions are in a competition for “religious consumers.” Religion mixed with capitalism—especially in a world saturated in mass media—is just as bad as mixing it with politics, but as long as people are willing to hand over money to religious leaders, there’s no way to divorce the two.

The wild card in these unholy alliances is religion. That’s not to say that secular governments can’t do evil or that capitalism is always good, but religion is the volatile catalyst that, when mixed with the desire for power and money, can create an unstoppable force.

So in the end it’s not the battle between various religions that defines 21st-century life; it’s the battle between rational secularism and irrational superstition. Barack Obama did not direct the killing of Osama bin Laden in the name of Jesus. He did it because bin Laden had committed crimes against the United States and its people. Casting it as a religious drama is merely one perspective, but perspective is all that counts.

Obviously the human species does not evolve all at once. There are always going to be those who are so tied to the old ways that they will never loosen their grip on the past. There will always be pockets of resistance, and these people will kill to keep the faiths of their fathers alive. Superstition remains a strong force in the world.

The agents of political theism are all around us. The only weapon progressives have is an appeal to rationalism and clear thinking. Given that religion and superstition flourish amongst the uneducated, the only antidote to religious madness is to stay focused on the primary goal of education: to teach people how to think.

In that light, have you ever asked yourself why Tea Party Republicans spend so much time trying to demonize educators? Does it make sense to you that these folks constantly want to cut funding for public education and limit access to secular education? Make no mistake about it, what drives the Tea Party is the same thing that drives radical Islam--a belief that religion and politics belong together. Our right wing is smart enough to provide a smokescreen of "fiscal responsibility," and they have yet to resort to terrorism, but the message is similar.

Last week I listened while a local right winger casually remarked that she prays every day that someone will assassinate President Obama. The only difference between this person and a Muslim suicide bomber is that she doesn't have the balls to do it.  

Think about it, if you are able. 

Friday, May 06, 2011

Why I don't care about high gasoline prices

by M. Stewart
Americans are complaining about high gasoline prices again, especially those who drive around in gas-hog SUVs and giant pickup trucks. Yee ha! Like a rock.

As far as I'm concerned, our country would be better off if gas prices hit $10 or $20 per gallon. Maybe then people would be forced to live close to where they work instead of in some suburb 5o miles a way. If people lived closer to work, they might choose to walk, take a bus, or ride a bicycle. At the very least they could drive a mile or two in a fuel-efficient car. We might rediscover the value of neighborhood schools and corner groceries.

If gasoline were $20 per gallon, it would cost too much to transport food across the world, forcing us to produce and buy our food locally. We would have more local farmers, and we might become more concerned about the quality of our soil, air, and water. We could seize the opportunity to begin dismantling our suburban blight to make room for more fields, orchards, and grazing land. It would make sense for people to live in cities and towns again instead of in "developments" built in a former farmer's field.

If gasoline were $20 per gallon, we might get serious about developing alternative energy sources. If necessity is the mother of invention--and it most certainly is--then human beings are up to the task. We always have been. Who says we have to transport ourselves around the world by burning large amounts of fossil fuels? There are other ways sitting on drawing boards all over the world for lack of investment. And some of the old ways aren't so bad either--walking, peddling, rowing, sailing. Why must everything have a gasoline engine attached to it? Why must we all be so damn lazy?

Where's the logic in continuing to foul our water, air, and soil by extracting and burning fossil fuels when we live so close to a star? Are we not smart enough to take full advantage of this good fortune? And despite high-profile disasters like Chernobyl and Fukushima, a nuclear energy program that recycles spent fuel is safer by far than the long-term environmental and public health disaster represented by the coal, oil, and gas industries. Yet we no longer build nuclear plants in this country. Instead we drill and dig, drill and dig, drill and dig. Ever wonder why?

Fat, loud conservatives who continue to get rich from the status quo don't want clean, sustainable energy--that's why. They don't want people to live simpler, less-toxic lives. What they want instead is an infinite army of consumers with a never-ending appetite for things they don't need.

We really can change the way we live and live better as a result. Cheap gasoline is the answer to every question only if we continue to ask the same questions and demand the same answers. There are plenty of very smart, innovative people in the world who are eager to solve our energy problems in new ways, but we refuse to give them the resources to do it. Instead, we demand more of the same. Drill and dig, drill and dig, drill and dig.

I'm sure that most of you will call me a naive, tree-hugging liberal. It won't be the first time. But what does that make you? It's time to push ourselves on to the next stage of human evolution. We definitely have the tools. Let's use them to improve our lives in ways that are meaningful. If all you want is a bigger car, a bigger hamburger, more cable channels and a bigger, more comfortable couch, then you will oppose any further human progress. You already have what you want. The rest of us will step over your diseased corpse on our way to the future.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Spider sex

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Congratulations

by M. Stewart
On Monday morning I wrote a piece about the bin Laden capture that no sane person could have taken seriously, only to discover that the over-the-top, right-wing, schizophrenic caricature I poked fun at was the average Tri-State Area citizen.

Things have gotten so crazy in this country that satire is no longer possible, so let me take my tongue out of my cheek and speak directly:

As the despicable coward Rush Limbaugh feeds the vulgar mob by demanding that President Obama apologize—yes, apologize—to the American people for ordering a successful mission against the world’s most-wanted terrorist, I will respond by thanking the president, the CIA, the Navy SEALs, and everyone involved in this complex, daring mission. The death of Osama bin Laden is great news, regardless of the threats of vengeance from al-Qaida and the crass gibberish of the American right wing. To me, there is little difference.

The ancient Romans would have brought bin Laden’s body back to Rome, tied it to a pole and paraded it through the streets while throngs of appreciative citizens pummeled him with rotten fruit. In the 21st century, quietly disposing of the corpse is a better idea, but one thing no Roman citizen would have done is demand an apology from their leader during the celebration.    

On the home front—

Congratulations to Mayor Jim Swoger for his narrow victory in Tuesday’s Democratic primary election. Given the one-sided politics of East Liverpool, Jim’s will be the only name on the general election ballot in November.

Congratulations also to Councilman Brian Kerr, who mounted a solid challenge by providing ELO residents with a legitimate resistance to the status quo. Keep in mind that the 50-vote margin means that if 26 people had gone the other way, Kerr would be our next mayor. So even in defeat, Brian brings significant political juice to city hall.  

I hope that Swoger, Kerr, and the rest of city hall will work together to develop a comprehensive plan to attack the most insidious problem our city faces, the one that all other problems flow from—the entrenched poverty industry. But I won’t be holding my breath. 

Lastly, I was pleased to see that East Liverpool voters supported the Carnegie Public Library levy. Passage of the levy is an indication that civilization is still alive in our town. 

Monday, May 02, 2011

The bin Laden hoax

by Bob Jones
Well, well, well. The big, bad wolf is finally dead. Or so says Barack Hussein Obama.

The president went on television last night to claim that 9/11 mastermind Osama bin Laden was killed in Pakistan by American special forces, but has anyone seen a death certificate? Have we seen the body?

We are told that bin Laden’s body was “buried at sea” in accordance with the Islamic tradition of burial within 24 hours of death. So the president is still kissing Muzzy butt! And just where is there a sea near the mountains of Pakistan? How do you bury someone in water anyway? Come on. How stupid do they think we are?

My friends, this is a hoax if I’ve ever seen one. We have solid intelligence that says bin Laden died of liver cancer three years ago. The future president of the Republican States of America, Donald Trump, should fund an investigation of this false claim. He is, after all, a wealthy businessman. Have you seen the private jet he takes to Vegas? 

Obviously, the hoax is all about giving al-Qaida a reason to step up terrorist attacks on American soil. Obama won’t stop until he wakes all the Islamic sleeper agents and brings our great nation down.